Nifty vs. Thrifty

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Taking control of your family life

Do you feel like what you say falls on deaf ears? Are you so tired of repeating the same thing over and over again? Perhaps you need to change your mindset!

Setting boundaries is so important in any relationship. I hear so many people say that they get taken advantage of and don’t know why. What they often don’t realize is that
humans naturally take until told otherwise. It’s human nature. Stay with me now, I can feel your blood pressure rising!
If you continuously accept a negative behavior, than you are sending the other person a message that what they are doing is acceptable. This person will naturally think that you don’t mean what you say because you are allowing the behavior to continue.

You can not fault a child who is told not to talk back but continues to do it without receiving consequences. Instead of saying no with only your words, say no by not accepting the behavior anymore and giving consequences. You are not being mean, you are being a parent that provides structure. Remember that you are the adult and need to control the environment. The same goes for teenagers and young adults. Children naturally learn socialization through trial and error. If you don’t teach them that there are consequences such as getting fired, getting arrested, maybe even getting turned down by a mortgage company for bad credit.

As adults, we have control over what happens in our lives. We can not blame others for situations that we continuously get ourselves into. It can be very hard saying no or giving consequences but it is essential for your happiness and also creating any healthy relationship. If you use these tools you will feel more control over your life and ultimately have a healthier, happier family life.

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